What It Means to Me to Be a Passionist

 Passionists are called to live and promote the Passion of Jesus, to live among the Crucified ones of today. We are called to bring the message of the cross to the ends of the earth.

For me it means to open myself up or to share with the whole world the love of Jesus who opened wide his arms on the cross to unite the whole world to himself. That is what I am called to be and to do so.

Some of the people think that Religious Life is saying no to everything. Some have asked me, why I did not marry and have my own children and family. It is true I could have had my own family but becoming religious I have many families and many children and it is true that Jesus said, if you leave your own family for my sake, you would receive one hundred fold.

Through my vocation of being a Passionist I am called to embrace the whole world through my ministry. There are many stories I can share with you to convey what it means to me to be a Passionist.

I am going to tell you one of my stories - the story of Mahesh, one of my friends - we studied in the same high school. Then he went to the university. I went in a different direction, continuing my studies. He died a few days before celebrating his 25th birthday.
I had privilege of having him share his story with me, the journey he made with his sickness. I had gone home for my holiday from the community and heard that he was sick. I went to see him. There was total silence. After couple of hours I came home. I continued to visit him almost every day and little by little he started to open up to talk. He told me that he thought everything was going to be well; he had finished his studies and got a job. He thought everything was going to change for his family. An unfortunate thing happened. He lost the strength to walk. He was taken to the hospital and he never walked again. He poured out his despair and bitterness. He had lost his career. He thought God was far away and did not hear his plea. Little by little he started to loose his sense of feeling below his chest. I could see his anger, sadness and anxiety. But I could not answer. Some years passed. I saw him again after two years. He had kept in touch through letters. When I saw him again he was completely a new person. He was able to support all his friends and gave them encouragement.


He said to me, Jasmine, I experienced something new. I thought God was far away, but
it is not true. God was suffering with me. This changed him completely. When I was preparing to go to Italy, he asked to me to leave something with him and I gave my rosary beads and he used it until his death. He died while I was in Italy. His mother wrote a letter after his death telling me that God was there in all their pain and suffering. He died peacefully.
I couldn't have supported him if I was married or in another order. But as a Passionist I was able to talk to him about Jesus Crucified and help him to look up and reach out to Jesus who was there already reaching out for him. I say with one of our first sisters; Jesus was crucified for me. I am a Passionist for Him.

Sr. Jasmine Lawrence. CP

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